"When you fall in a bottomless pit, you die of starvation."

"The Aristocrats" came up in conversation yesterday, which made me think of Sarah Silverman's version of the joke (which I liked), so then I imdb.com-ed her, and apparently she was in "There's Something About Mary," which I totally didn't remember, so then I got all curious and wanted to watch it once I got home to see where she comes up (is she Woogie's wife?), so then I got home, ran, had dinner, showered, and settled down to watch the movie. But I Could Not Find It. Hours of anticipation for naught. Oh frustration of all frustrations. (I don't even know what that means.) Like Whomp in Super Mario 64 would say, "UR URGH!" (I too promptly flung myself face down on my bed.)

Run on sentences aside, I tore through my desk in desperation, looking for the movie. Didn't find it, but I did find two movie gift certificates, a ruler which I thought I lost, and best of all, one of those little plastic Cal/AC Transit sleeves that they give you when you get your class pass! I love those things, and I thought I had broken all of mine.

I watched "Old School" instead, and while it wasn't what my craving was for, it was glorious nonetheless.